gAde~kATe

Been quiet on the log

2008-01-27T08:06:00.000-08:00

Well well well,
I'm not absolutely tired of keeping journal fresh, but I've been doing so much stuff lately such as newsletter, dance-team newsletter, keeping track with works and other projects. I'm very busy right now.

Recently, God challenges me to love people. There are many kind of people that I really want to ignore them, but I'm guilty by not treating them nicely as they are my brothers and sisters. Love, love, love that can cover everything. I need to remember it and practice it so that it will become my character.

Just wanna keep it short and clear!
Gade

Be still

2007-12-06T03:08:00.000-08:00

Hey, I'm just not sure how much I wanna pour out about me right now! It's kinda hard time to find where I'm at with God since it has been busy with serving in 2 ministries and house sitting somewhere away from where I work. I got upset easily with people who've been annoying me both with words and actions. However, today I just felt my limit of being good and nice will be torn down somehow, but God rescues me on time. There was a sharing about our attitude toward our beloved brother and sister who falls in sin. We usually judge them, and we try to hide our problem or try to not getting caught when we're sin because it's shameful to stand up and confess our sin to others or we may want to blame people who fall in sin. However, God's love is different from what I'm responding to people. I'm quickly judge them and want to stay away from them, and I admit that it's hard to love people or forgive or accept them. God show me just a great example of Jesus, and I believe God did something in our heart to people in Ram II base here. Something that we call the power of the perfect love, and it will cast out the fear, and the love that make us understand about his mercy so that we may change from the inside out. It's cool that I just once again meditate on it..

Thanks to God for his teaching me, and I can't wait to spend a moment in a quiet place with him alone! God is good! His kindness, goodness and mercy will lead us to repentance.

Blessings,
Gade

Endure!

2007-10-18T23:27:00.000-07:00

Hey, I've been away from keeping my journal up to date, and I don't want to blame any of works because it just me don't try to make it happen =(...

However, my life is doing ok. I'm not been healthy enough for both physical and spiritual way. I don't eat much, and I don't pursue my workout schedule at all. I've been lay back from truly seeking God in my devotional. I put up with my friend to have devotional time together, and I've leading him to grow in God, but I felt like I have no more to give him since I'm so dry and hardly keeping my excitement life with the Lord. I found myself forcing itself to go beyond my strength, and I felt 2 ways: one is that I show my honest hunger for God, but in the other hand, I just pretend that I can do it!! Well, don't be confused like I'm right now=)

God's challenging me to be endure and persevere toward his goal. I got so many attractions from doing what I suppose doing. Once is my sin which keep holding me back, and the second one is my behavior of addicted stuff like Korean series, noble reading, and doing crazy thing when I get bored. God corrected me to live in Holy life, and don't treat it like Esau did with the right of being the Oldest son when he treated it with only one meal. I admit that there are many time I fall in temptation, and I try to get up on my feet many time, but over and over that I fall and try to get up. So I truly need prayers to have faith that Jesus would keep me holy as his bridge. Please keep praying for me that I'll overcome my weaknesses. The more I'm ministering to other people, the more I'm struggling with my own thing. And I wanna live out freely with hope.

I'm trying to be endure and persevere, please pray for me. Thank you so much.

Blessings,
Gade

How much I should trust in Him

2007-08-18T04:15:00.000-07:00

Dear all,

A short message to let you know that I'm clam down from what is freaking me out right now. I suppose to be up in ChiangMai for the Asia Pacific Conference for performing and as translator. Usually, we got budget from people who run the Conference to help us, but in this time there is no money at all. I already trained some dancers to dance in my piece, and when I got an email saying there is no budget for our transportation and housing.. I just don't know how to respond to this email. However, I'm not freaking out that our team can't perform as a Thai team since we got invitation. I'm going to do my best with hope, and I'll do it until to the end and wait to see God moves among us.. It's a big challenge, but I'm ready for it!!!! Also, pray for me to be in the realistic world as well, there may be time of sacrificing, and there can be a time of stand for one another. Who knows, God may want to change our perspective of dancers in my team.. Please pray that I'll hear God's word carefully.. Praise God for who he is.. The provider, the faithful one..

I'm doing alright recently. Still have fun with job in the office and hanging out with my old friends who came to visit me in Bangkok.

On prayer trip.

2007-07-09T08:16:00.000-07:00

Hey,

I'm off from the office in about a week and half, and I'm joining the prayer team to go down South of Thailand. We want to pray according for God has showing us, and we want to be part of this battle for Thai people. Please pray that we'll travel safe, and we will be interceding for the LOST... May God provide the divine appointment -) I'm so exciting to go, and I can't wait to join with journey!

Last Saturday one of my good friend was getting marriage, and I post up a picture here, and also one of my very close friend is getting marriage in this weekend, so I'm going to be there for them.. Yay!!

Update

2007-06-26T03:51:00.000-07:00

I don't really know where I should beging with this update, since I've been through lots of thing,and each thing takes much of time to share. I completely discourage with friendship when we are on our flesh desire. Also, I'm searching for God's heart of seeing myself in his perspective and other people. I need the light to shine on me and take me to the right way, and I want that light to shine from inside out as I'm living for Christ.

God has been faithful to me. Although I'm struggling to trust for his provision, he kindly show me what he wants me to do. My support money reduces more than 2000 baht ($55), and I had many idea come through my mind, and I suppose to raise support, but I felt God challenges me to take this opportunity to bless the fellow staff who face the same thing like me and pray for one other. I have such peaceful heart to trust that he will make a way for me to receive enough support.

I've seen division among our family, and I really need to fight for the peace by doing the spiritual warfare and seek to understand and comfort others. I'm looking to my heart, and from now on I want to make it right before God and others. Please please please keep praying for me.

Blessings & much love..
Gade

What can I do?

2007-06-01T08:21:00.000-07:00

What has been in my heart recently is stiring up in me to reach out to the lost....And I kinda question myself how I reach to them?

Today I experience a great confusion of lies that people have heard and believed, and I just curious what I suppose to do.. There is an uncle who sits next to the YWAM office everyday, for his business takes place underneath YWAM building. Also, today was group came in our Soi to give away some tracks that I don't know what is about. I walked in today, and I felt like God challenges me to spend time talking to this uncle whom I greet him everytime I see him. So I walked in, and he said he got something to give it to me. When I checked out the tracks, I'm pretty sure that it's not about Christianity, but it's similar, too. I asked some questions, and I found out that uncle read through it already. So I told him to not believe in it, but he asked some questions about Christ. I told him that Jesus is the only way to go to heaven, and he told me different story about Christ... He doesn't believe that there is God in this universe, and he mess up the story of Christ to be someone else that I never heard about.. It hurts because he doesn't know the truth, and I don't know where he got this information from. The enemies works so hard to lie to him, and his eyes, ear, mind, and heart are completely shut for the truth, for he hold what he knew as the truth.

One thing I found out in my relationship with God is that God loves him still.. I felt just a glimpe of his grieve, but his love never grown weary for that uncle.. When I came in my office and pray for this uncle.. My mind was full of ways to avoid this uncle since he didn't want to believe what I believe, and I thought there is no business to deal with him..But God turns my thought upside down, for he wants me to keep loving with guy and give him help anytime that I have opportunity..My respond to God is about loving this man, and I have to hold on to God to reveal his truth to me so that I can live it out. . . . . . . I'm thankful to God that he is with me, and he kindly show me how to walk in this situation.. Here what I wanna share and remind myself of how deep of my Father love..

The Narrow Gate to HEAVEN. . . .

Seeking Jesus

2007-01-13T19:47:00.000-08:00

I liked the truth of Luke 19:1-10, story of Jesus and Zacchaeus. Maybe many people have read this passages, and God reveals in different thing, and God revealed me whose heart that he is looking for. Several months in Montana, I completely trust and have faith in God, but I'm lacking of the knowledge of God. In the other hand, I just didn't give my time to God for getting to know him better. Zacchaeus' heart was about to see Jesus, and he climbed up on the tree because he was seeking Jesus. God is faithful of who he is, so Jesus came to Zacchaeus, and he even more surprised Zacchaeus for going to Zacchaeus' house. Then I've seen how soft of Zacchaeus' heart when Jesus came to him as a friend who doesn't care what a sinner he is, so he repented with the action of faith, and Jesus revealed his love and salvation to him. I hope that I would be like Zacchaeus,for I quickly turn to God many times when I have sin, but it was because I felt guilty. At this time what I've learned through this passage is that God requires me a heart of hunger to see Jesus personally so that he would make me to absolutely repentant.

I listened to a song calls "Mighty to save" by Hillsongs church in Aus, and I love the word "Author of Salvation".. . . . . How wonderful that I have Jesus as a Author of Salvation who seeks for me, and who will lead me to worship him. I remembered myself dance in worship time for a couple time, and before I got to do that I refused to dance because I knew that I didn't have a right attitude. But God did break through, so I just love for being there and dance freely in worship for him. Because I know that he is worthy for me to be obey him and glorify his name... This is my love for him, my God who accept my messyness, and he never turned away from me, when I call for him. He is bigger than I can think of, and his imaginations are incredible.

This is a couple from my Chicago trip... I like them so much because they have been showing me a Jesus' heart for his people. I miss them so much =) By the way, I miss all of people back in Thailand and other places as well. I used to pity on myself of my personal issue, and I also can't make any relationship even deeper with anyone. This is the cost I have to pay, and through this moment I do believe God prepares me for something ahead. I know that I never been alone, but sometimes I need people whom I knew and trust. . Now I'm tired of building trust in new people whom I'm going to leave them again. Anyway, this is how I feel. . . . and I hope that I'll get over it sometimes.

Lost in blog for awhile!!

2006-12-18T12:55:00.000-08:00

It was a very crazy time for me in the school, and I just finished the 1st quarter which took about 3 months long in School of Dance Studies.. Imagine a Thai girl who absolutely didn't know much about the Western dances, and she has tried to catch up with many new thing in the school, and in the same time she has to deal with the 2nd language of lecture studies and technique classes. Many time I was overwhelmed with enotional, and I found out myself listen to the lairs. The school is tough, but I have came very far. Last week was the most tough week of mine when I thought through 2 final exams, turning in our timeline project, and to be understudy in Steve Rooks' peice for the whole week. I must confess that I have a hard time in memorize the dance history lectures, I knew that I undestood some, but when I came out from the class, everything was gone! I turned my paper works in, and I got a good grade on it, but I didn't really remember what I did. . . When I sit on the exam time, I was struggling that I have no answer for the test. Our staffs have been a big helpful to us, but still I didn't do my part very well.. I came to the part that I'm so frustated and discouraged because I have no time on studying to make myself understand very clear about the class and studying. Then a couple missionary who had led me to Christ in the past give me a wisdom words that my God never gave such a heavy burden to me, he knows deeply how much I can bear, and he tursts in me, so it brought me back to humble myself and believe in his promise. God is so good to comfort me again when I loose my mind somewhere about who God is.

I'm having a two weeks break from school, so right now I'm in Chicago, but before I got in Chicago I had to wait for a day in the airport to get in the sirplane, I found myself praying to God that I'm letting him to do his work in me, I want to go to Chicago, but I got the stand by ticket, if he wants me to go to Chicago in that day,I'll go by faith. I ended up that day by calling somebody that I never known to pick me up from the airport in Missoula coz I couldn't make it. It's akeward for me, but God brought me to have a new friend who used to be student in the same school that I'm doing right now. We have such a good time, and I felt peace inside as I knew God is doing something in me. Then I went back to the airport again in a very early morning to get in the morning flight, and at this time I really felt God will take me out from Missoula, and it happened. I got to Chicago, but nobody knew that I was coming, my friend were at Church, so I called, and I didn't have much coins to make any other call, so I just only left a message in that calling and waited patiently at the airport with hope for someone to pick me up. It went couple hour, and nobody showed up, so I prayed again by faith. In next 15 mins my friend whom I left message in his phone showed up, and I got to go with him. I had such a wonderful time with them, and I'm thanksful to God for everything. I was nervous to travel alone,and this time was a big challenge for me, and I don't want to do it in the 1st time, but God is taking a good care of me, and he is with me.. That's wonderful... I've learned so much during these two days..

I'm looking forward for the next quarter of school, I hope that I'll learned from God so much more, and I'll hold my focus on him very well. Will get on update before the Christmas!! (hope so)

Blessings,
Kate

In the dance school

2006-10-14T20:28:00.000-07:00

In the dance school

Another time of learning a new thing which I first was frustated so much, and when I reached to the 4th week of the school, I just found out there is more fun to find out what I really like. This week has been an awesome week for me as we were studying Modern dance with Jolene, the founder of the School Of Dance Studies in Montana. I was so amazed when she had me on her piece, but I graded myself very low on this kind of dance because I hadn't take any class, so God worked through her to get me come across of my natural abilities. Right now I kinda like the modern dance more than other kind because it's my body, and I just have to listen to my body how it wants to move! I felt like I just discovered myself in the new way, and God turns me to another level of trusting, knowing him as a creator, and his creation as me.

Last Friday we performed this dance, and praise God that I got many good feed back as encouragement to remind me that I'm in the right place. I went off serval time with different emotion and questioning myself. Through this week what I've seen is that God is so strong in me as I'm very weak. All these matters weren't come from me, but it came from my God. Oh,,, the Scriptures that brought Jolene to teach us this piece is on Isaiah 40:28-31, so I felt right on the piece as I'm weary, and God gives such a powerful strength.

I do miss my home, my friends, my favorite places and movies!!! Last week was hard because I was down too much in homesick, and I couldn't sense how God desired to comfort me, so I went out of the base with word that kept repeating in my mind "it's ok". I cried, not too hard, and I had such a wonderful time with God out in the cold, but I love that time so much. I've learned to lean on him and to look to him. Then I had a new friend from DTS took be out for ice-cream, my favorite thing ever!

Another thing that I must mention about, coz I'm not sure when I'll do my blog agian, is that my future. I wanna do the School Of Worship, and there are serval thing that I must consider. Montana is great, but I'm not sure if I'll be alright with the winter for another year, and the School Of Worship in Thailand is starting right away after my School Of Dance Studies over. I really want to take a month off to not do any thing because this school make me work so hard, and I'll miss the dancing so much if I'll be in another school for 6 months. So I'm praying and listening to God what he wants me to do.

Alright, must go now.

Life in last couple month

2006-08-30T09:28:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone,

Thanks so much for having been reading my journal on the page. I haven't update it such a long time, for I really want to write down an impact story to my life, but I believe there will be many story that push me to write down into words here in next 6 months.

I helped out in the Smoothies Shop near by the Mae Fa Luang University in July after the DTS was over. God revealed my personal issue in my hardship time when I wasn't accepted in the way I am at that time from my close friend. I'd been trying so hard to make people accept me,and I lost my own self sometimes. When my close friend denied me, I started to look to God and make decision on helping out at the shop. In meantime, I did learn about my freedom in Christ, and I knew that God wants me to be happy not in pain of who I am.Anyway, I had such a beautiful time there with all relationship from people that God put into my life.

Switch gear down to Bangkok in August a bit, I was glad to see my friends around. After awhile I went back home to visit my family and friends who work in Tsunami area. My sister has been in trouble with the school a lot because she skip the school, and hung out with guy. When I spent time with her in last 3 weeks, I found out that she deeply wants to have friend. She is teenager, and she wants someone who understand her need and to guide her what good to do, but she chose a wrong friend to follow. To be honest, I was give up with my sister many time,and I thought that my parents deserve all kind of fruits which happen because of lacking descipline. God turned me to see that it wasn't only my parents fault, but it was work of my enemies as well. Lairs has been seeded in my sister mind, and it's bearing such a bad fruit right now. So I must pray for my sister and still love her beacause God loves her so much, too. It causes me to cry when I saw my mom was hopeless when she didn't know where my sister is in each time as the school called. It produces division among my family when each one of them turn their back on each other, so God taught me to move in the opposite spirit. My brothers and sisters in Christ, I can't fight in this battle alone, so please pray and fight with me for my family that they will become family in Christ.

I'm going to leave Thailand in September 6, which is very soon. This is a big step for me to take as I have to leave all problems behind and to trust that God is in control.As a vision in my heart will become true, enemies try to put me down badly. I'm struggling in many area, so I need lots of prayers that I'll overcome my own selfishness and have same characters of Jesus Christ. I believe God never left me out in the dark that he won't do anything else to save me. I'm praying for my life will be leading by Holy Spirit so that the fruits of Holy Spirit will be within me for his glory and his Kingdom.

Season of my life is changing now, and I'm ready to jump in with God! May his goodness will be known, and people will glorify of his name. Amen!

What DTS taught me.

2006-06-20T05:04:00.000-07:00

Life has been so tough at the moment which brings me to the point of giving up. Since I've staffing DTS school up in ChiangRai, I've learned so much through people and situations. I used to think it could be easy to hang out with people and make friend with them. The time I'm working with people can be time of getting to know myself better. I've found I'm very strong will person, and it takes risk for people to reach to me. Grief inside of my heart keeps pouring out because of myselfishness, and I broke down manytime when I face with it. God gave such a great friend, Mae, coz she opened my eyes to see that friend is not just how good I am, but it's about love purely from God. She is going to love me as I am not just because I'm mature person and I did good in everything. The real love which I've touched right now helps me to look to God much better, for there is a hole in me that I need someone to fill me up, and God reveals himself through my friend.

I'm used to have only friendship with people,but I haven't done to the part of partnership to accomplish some tasks together, and in this DTS I was practicing on those stuff. Yep, when it was hard, I was ready to quite, and run away, but what is in God's heart was different. He wants to see me grow through this hardship time. He wants to bring me closer to my friend and work out our relationship in the better way. I was hopeless to deal with myself, I felt I'm a jerk and I'm nobody to anyone. God met in the midst of my self-rejection, and I'm releasing to the bondage that I haven't relized before. God is good always! I understood myself where I'm at better. I can reach to other easily because these self rejection couldn't limit me in God's ministry. I'm standing up to fight with it, and God is my side.

5 weeks down in Pattaya is coming

2006-05-12T11:16:00.000-07:00

What zup,

Time flies so fast, life runs so slow. I felt like I don't have much time to process what's happening in me, but what I know is that I'm going to travel to Pattaya with my team and stay there for 5 weeks.

I'm struggling in my own insecure that I care so much of others' thinking. I don't have much confident to do something, and I always ask myself if I did good enough. Sometimes I went to someone and talked about the stuff that I was wrong, but no one cares about it. Anyway, I'm learning to let it go and to keep my eyes on to Jesus. Jesus didn't please himself, but he chose to please his people, and I'm practicing to support others and to care for them more than myself. An excuse I love to use is that I'm a kind of introverted person, so I like to isolate myself and can't get into deep relationship with anyone. Now I learn to be balance, and I sense God honors what I'm willing to do.

I'm exciting to go back down in Central area coz I miss my crew so much. I have appiontment of visa interview on June 1, in Bangkok, so I'm going to see my dearest friend as well. Praise God, I'm exciting what he is doing in my life, but at the same time I'm controlling myself to make today as the best day for him.

Blessings,

Kate

The last week before next mini-outreach

2006-03-19T21:27:00.000-08:00

Hey,I've been busy so much after the first mini-outreach finished because I'm bad to organize and keep following my schedule.I love my life in the DTS which is about fellowship, building up each other with love and all the teaching through speakers & God's revealation. Last month we went out to HuaNamRin village, and our works were laying sement, digging dirt, pulling down the old Church and moving stuff around in the Church. It was a great experience to all of us in the team, but I did miss my dad as we used to work together for our new house, but at this time I had much joy because we worked in a team of Christ. Moreover, God gave us a specific thing to pray about, and we were amazed of God's faithfulness. I can say that we did a geart job for the village, and I love each one of my team because everyone laid down their own right to make team as a team.

I relized how much I've been allowing lairs live in my mind such a long time, since we learned about sin & repentance. My past, my rejection root with my mom effected me badly in the past 23 yrs, so when God confornted me about my attitude of my hearts and how I responded to my mom in the wrong way because of my painful emotionals, I came to the point of confess and ask for forgiveness from the Lord. The most powerful word I've not heard before is "I forgive you,my daughter", which came from God right after I confessed my sin and bitterness. God is great to me always.

I got more confirmation from the Lord about his purpose of my life, and I'm amazed of my Christianility life in the last 6 yrs. God has put me in the place to prepare the way of other people to come and reap. God is going to use my character to bring none-Christain to know about Christianility, so I'm really exciting to jump in the challenging way and make the way for the greater people to come. I love to be a pioneer, and there is a time for my life to be at some place for a while, but I believe that I will be in some places in long term as well. I'm happy with my life now to find new thing to do and enjoy my single life.

Only few day left that we will go out for a great outreach which we don't have any plan set up before hand, and we are going to lean on God totally!! I'm so exciting to jump on,and I must stand firm in God's word so that I will experience him differently. Hope to post up my journey of the next outreach soon!

God is awesome!

2006-01-26T06:38:00.000-08:00

It's hard to believe that I'm still alive!! ;0 . . . . . I have no clue where my energy came from since I came back from Bangkok. My life was challenged to stand and take up more responsibilities as Melissa couldn't be with us any more. It was my hard time,for I sensed the same feeling of my friend dying in my DTS. I didn't get much time to fight myself, but I had to head out to get all thing done for the school. Anyway, the school already started almost 2 weeks.

I began to understand more of God's revealation in both prayers and worship. Last week all of us learned about prayer life, and this week is our worship week. I must confess that I've longed to meet with Hudson family so much. I met them in Bangkok last Christmas, but I do miss them and I feel home as they are here. I can't understand myself well enough because I felt that everything is changing there, and there is no place for me to go back, and I didn't feel get along with any team. I left Bangkok so long, but I do miss my friends and other families down there. I almost cry everytime when I get emails and phone calls from them.But last Christmas down in Bangkok, I dealt too much with my emotion. Hudson family has only 1 day left with us in the school, and I'm going to miss them so much. All teaching that they gave are a confirmation to my future.But only God has a permanent plan to me, I'm seeking it.

Tonight was good night to me, for we had a great worship. I had a good time with my God really that I opened to him and touched his love. Only thing I can offer is my heart, since I've been giving my heart into lots of thing. I miss my family down in Phangnga as well because this school is kinda family to me, and I love to be around the students. There are challengings, problems and thing I have to deal with, but God extends his grace for me to step out without fear. I'm arising to worship God, and I love to have freedom on worshiping God like tonight. God is great!! He is so faithful, for he knows how much need I have. Praise God!

This pic is for Melissa, one of our staff who is going to go back home in the end of this month. I love her, I want to get to know her more. I love to work with her, and I believe that one day we will meet each other again. God bless you, my dear friend!

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year

2005-12-21T05:40:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to all of you!! Let us celebrate the Birthday of our Lord,Jesus Christ. May all of you have a wonderful time while you are spending time with him personally. May our new year will be joyful year of salvation, love, kind, mercy and His faithfulness. We hope and pray that all of the world will sing in the same voice "Hallelujah to the Lamb of God"

Training life . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

2005-11-30T01:26:00.000-08:00

Hey,

Well, I'm doing very good here. There are tons of thing I need to learn from God in this time. There are some teaching in the practical way to take and people's lives to learn from. Moreover, we have so much projects to work on, but I do have much fun to do my job, the creative thing!!

It was scare me when we were learning about the prayer life of leader, for there is only 0.15% of the time when we pray to our God, but we do spend most of our time in activities. What can work in our lives better between prayers and activities? Yep, absolutely, I have to come back to God again to learn how to pray from his heart for his people and his work to be done. The more we are up in the leader position, the more we have manything to deal with and to work on, that means we have less in prayer time. Right now I have to confess that I have really a bit of time to spend with God, too. Oh... poor children of God!! (I meaned myself)

The weather is so good now, I enjoy with it. God keeps speaking to me with his love to not make me discourage on my life. Sometimes,I do care so much about who I am, and I just pity on myself.. But now I learn to stand firm in God, no matter how much I have to be alone, but God is my best friend. Only God should be enough to make me work out of my relationship with other.

The theme of the school is "Rise & Worship", I felt like I need to rise up from my past, my hardship and my own struggling, for it's time to rise up and worship my God with my whole heart. God is great all the time. And worship is the key that I can pour my heart into his presence so that I won't be alone in this earth anymore.

A Big Step To Take

2005-10-31T17:05:00.000-08:00

Everything of mine is belonging to God.

This is a story of one girl who was born in a five daughters family. She thought she can be strong like a guy to make her dad happy and to take care her sisters well. So many time she acts out without thinking that she is a girl. Badly, she didn't care about her own nationality, for she doesn't want to be a tender girl. Yep, until she came to Christ, she still holding her pride so tight. Sadly, this girl is ending up her faith by making people stumble on her behaviours.

Can't believe that person is me!! I'm a prideful person that I just care for myself. I allow myself to be the way I wanna be. In the past over 5 yrs,I didn't care much if anybody told me to stop acting like a kid or tom-boy girl. I know I'm not a tom-boy girl, but people can tell immediately what my past was about. Moreover I didn't respect to my nationality. God has his own reason to create me as a Thai girl, but it's hard for me to accept this truth. I don't want to be a girlie person. Then many people came to be with a humble heart to tell me what my big blind spot is.

God really spoke to me if I do care about the body of Christ,and my body isn't belonged to me beacause it's a temple of God,so this is a big changing I need to take on. I'm coming to the point that I don't know how I can be changed. But I need him the most during this time of changing. It's hurtful inside, but I believe I'll be healed, and I'll be able to live my life in God's love more and more. Everyday I must put my old clothes away so that God can put a new one on me.

I have to prove myself by staffing the DTS school. Please be with me in prayers while I'm praying that I'll have a right heart after God, a right-positive mind and action in this big training. May God will be glorified through my life.

Jesus' compassion

2005-09-13T21:36:00.000-07:00

"Jesus traveled through all the cities and villages of that area, teaching in the synagogues and announcing the Good News about the Kingdom. And wherever he went, he healed people of every sort of disease and illness. He felt great pity for the crowds that came, because their problems were so great and they didn't know where to go for help. They were like sheep without a shepherd. He said to his disciples, "The harvest is so great, but the workers are so few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send out more workers for his fields." Matthew 9:35-38

I was overwhelmed by the compassion of Jesus, while we were reading this passage last week. I felt that his heart is crying for people in this area. They are like sheeps who have no shepherd, and they are listening to each other, following each other to find the safe place for themselves. They are panic when the trouble comes, and they have no idea how to rest their souls. However, they still can't hear their shepherd's voice calling them to a safe place where their souls are lifted in love. We keep asking God for more worker of God to come as a sheep to follow Jesus' voice so that other sheeps will see and follow Jesus like that worker do. The worker who has compassion like Jesus and heal people of every sort of disease and illness like Jesus did in everywhere he went.

I found myself desperated for him. I'm nobody to anyone,but Jesus is the somebody to everyone. I'm easily lose a heart to be with people, but Jesus sit and eat with the sinners. I can't love some people who didn't showing love by their words, action or even in their thoughts there is no love for me,but Jesus forgave all of people who put him in trouble and made him to be hung on the cross. Honestly,I'm really tired, have no strength, lots of thing bother me everyday, but I do feel the grace of God falls like rain into my life. There are joy, peace, love from him for me. Thanksful to him as I'm here, I have a wonderful time of relationship with all kind of people. I'm learning more about the servant heart for Christ, not only people. When I'm smiling, there is God who is smiling with me. When I'm crying, there is Jesus who is crying and praying for me with an understand and a broken heart. When I'm lonely, there is Jesus who comforts me. When I'm stubborn to do everything by my own way, there is a loving and kind father in heaven who corrects my wrong attitudes, and he is patient to see me growing up in each part of my life. When I think there is nobody around me, there is the one who draws lots of friends to me and make me happy through the fellowship & encouragements. Anyway, I'm nobody!!! But God does care for me,in every part of me. Praise God for his wonderful job.

"Lord, thanks so much that you are real to me. I pray for all of my sisters and broher in Christ will see you are real for each one of them as well. I'm asking for your guidance, please light the way for each one of us. For we are willing to take up our cross and follow you, here we are!! Use us, teach us, be with us, show us how to heal people from every sort of disease and illness. Not by our might, but by your power Lord, I pray for your power to drive us in the place you want us to be. I pray for your truth will be laid deep in our hearts and lives. We'll be free by your truth, and freely to help others. May your kingdom establish in this earth like in heaven, Amen."

Blessings & love,
Kate

A great good news

2005-09-01T15:37:00.000-07:00

'This same Good News that came to you is going out all over the world. It is changing lives everywhere, just as it changed yours.

Colossians 1:6, NLT'

Hey,

=) =) Wow.. I would say God is so great!!! Today I have been praising God for many times becauseI'm blessed through his ministry here. Yesterday after I shared about gospel to a couple Thai girl, I got this scriptures to encourage me again. This Good news has been changing my life everyday, and now I have more faith to keep sharing it to people around here so that their lives will change like mine. These two ladies are interesting to know who God really is. Thank you to all of you that you joined in this ministry through prayers, encouragements and all kind of support.

Let me tell you what going on with the accident issues from last couple week. Praise God because everything went well, our staff already left Thailand to England. The training is going to start on Monday, so I guess I'm going to be a busy girl by then. Right now my role is about administrative and accounting, and I'm hoping to get to know Thai students as well. I have much fun to work here, and I believe that God's calling Thai into his Kingdom more and more.

Please keep praying for people here when they hear the truth of God, it'll grow deep in their heart. I'm just his jar to be where he wants me to be and help people whom he wants to help. However, I have learned how to obey him and be a blessing to the needy. But I'm really blessed through all of his works. It's so wonderful.

May you have a wonderful time with our Lord Jesus Christ, too. Let us celebration because the salvation is coming to other brothers and sisters like in heaven. May his name is lifting up on high.

Blessings & Love
Kate

Deep Healing.

2005-08-23T17:00:00.000-07:00

Hi,

No wondered, I'm in Kao Lak for 2 months right now. God reveals me how easily for me as a Shouthern people to listen to the hearts of people here. Just only one day when I met with people who came over to have some training, they already shared their hearts. Praise God.

But the battle still going on, one of our staff in Step Ahead got in trouble by the serious accident which killed two Thais. The process takes much time, and our staff already discouraged. She didn't get her passport back. Although she supposed to leave the country last week,she hasn't leave yet. The impossible thing in human sight will be possible in God's hands, so please keep praying for us. Moreover, due to these issues,The next courses of training have to cancel as we must run it in this week, and we know the enemies try to destroy us, but we'll be able to go through this by the mighty hands of God.

Please pray for me as a only Thai woman in the ministry right now that I will let God works through me. Pray that I'll sense the broken heart and speak the right word at the right time. God comforts me, so I would like to comfort those who are in needed. May his glory fill this earth plentifully.

Blessings & Love,
Kate

God Is At Work

2005-07-25T00:48:00.000-07:00

Sawad D Kha,

I'm meditating on 2 example lives from the Bible, Joshep and David. Last time I got a wonderful chance to translate a preaching for Julie Smude at the ChiangRai City Church. Like God spoke to me directly about dream which he has put in my heart. Both Joshep and David knew what God wanted them to be, and they had been gone through many difficult times before their dream came true, but they still faithful and not give up to reach to that dream.

I have no doubt why God put me in ChiangRai. He had a perfect lesson for me to reach to my dream some how, and it's not what I can manage for myself. I learned how to teach kids to dance, I learned how to dance freely, I learned how arts can be impact in the church and I learned how I can be a artist of God. While I was in ChiangRai, there were hunred of thing I have to deal with. I knew myself better, I understood where weaknesses are,and I found the great key to remain in God's promise. "I'm with you,I'll help you and I hear your voice"- this passage came to me 2 days before I left Bangkok. And this true has set me free from untrusting of his promise. So right now I'm happy to wherever God puts me in, for I'm trusting there is a reason of him to let me there. Although, I'm in the hard time, he is still at work.

I would like to give honor to Bob & Jackie Robinson as well. Almost 5 months I was in ChiangRai they were a great help to me. They are not just a teacher,but hey are my friends, my example and my supporters too. Jackie didn't charge me for any money to study dance with her because of her heart for the Lord and to dance. Moreover, they supported me every month when I was there. I can't forget them for all of what they have done for me. "Thank you so much". And for all people in ChiangRai, too, I would like to thank you to let me in the family, and gave me opportunities to do my ministries with all of your loving adn kindness. All of you are the great blessing to my life!!! =)

God bless all of you richly,
Love,
Kate

When We Are Loved!

2005-07-01T20:23:00.000-07:00

Hey,

I'm telling you a sweet experience which I had from last couple week ago. I was asked to be teacher for 3 days in pre-school while another teacher was attending a training. At the first hand, I would say 'no' cuz I can't be with kids the whole day, and there are 28 kids together. The big challenge was I have to wear skirt while I'm working with kids, can't imagine hah? But when I brought this to talk to God, I felt I should accept this job and help the school for God's sake. Then I said 'yes', and I asked for God's helping and depened on him alot. While I was working I had peace inside and enjoyed my time with kids. Well, I was very tired because I'm a only Thai teacher in the class with other 2 foriegner teachers, and the kids liked to come to me asking for do everything for them, but I had a wonderful time with kids. I learned to love them first and principle them at the same time no matter which family style they come from. On my last day, one kid ran to me and said "I love you,P'Kate" with a smiling face. Oh... I couldn't remember how I smiled when I had heard it,and my heart was so full. Moreover, I saw how different when his characters were changed because he felt he is loved and he also love that person,y'know. Love is so powerful by changing us to a greater point. I didn't espect anything like this, but thanks to God for let me experience how deep love can work through our life. So I won't hold my love from anyone, I meaned I wanna love all kinds of people like Jesus does.

So I thought about this, how God's action is when we tell him 'I love you so much'. We would change our lives to please him,right? Because he accept the way we are!

I have 3 weeks left from being in ChiangRai, and I really have a great time with Robinson family. Need prayer for my next month to be at my sweet home with family and helping out the Tsunami ministry in the South of Thailand. May you have richest blessing from God for this month!!!

Blessings & Love,
Kate

Reporting!!

2005-06-21T00:28:00.000-07:00

Hey,

Last weekend I went to A-je and Nancy ministry which is working with A-ha hill tribe. I really enjoyed my time there by teaching dances and spend time with the youth. It's priviledge from God to let me there and help, so I had much fun and blessings through their ministry.

I'm in ChiangRai right now, and it seems like I have a busy schedule lays ahead for me until I will go back to Bangkok. By not lying to anyone, I'm looking forward to go back to Bangkok, to see my friends and YWAM base there. Oh, the National Conference will be held on August 3-7, 2005 in ChiangMai, which makes me the most excited to get to see other friends from my DTS, and all of my friends in Bangkok will come up for the Conference. It looks like a big gang of the same age come to the Conference, so I can't espect how fun we gonna be like....

I'm still in process of 'waiting', and I'm not complaining cuz I trust God will give the right answer to me in the right time. I'm so weak and impatient, but God is the greatest in my life.... Thanksful to him for he allowed me to be his life in me.

A new week just started, and I pray you will have a good week with God and all of serving or working. God bless you.

Kate

Visiting ChiangMai

2005-06-11T17:05:00.000-07:00

Sawad D kha,

I'm in ChiangMai right now!!! YE Ye, pretty miss many places and friends here. Well, I got to spend time with Sara, P'Nueng and P'Prin a lot. God is so faithful to give me a break from ChaingRai. =)

There is nothing new for me right now. God still speaking to me, but all of them are encouragement words to help me keep focusing on him. Last 3 days I heard a little voice asked me " what do you have?". Then I relized I need to thanksful for what I have, which it is God's given. Then I got the scriptures to support it. I felt like God doesn't only want me to see what I have, but keep giving thanks to it and doing it the best for God. Anyway, I would love to enjoy everything I'm doing right now- like spending time with my friends,talking to my friends,studying dances and going out to present Christ in my life. I relize it never enough in our thoughts for what we have, but I choose to keep giving thanks and asking God to bless all of it in the way he wants it to be. Not my will but his be done!!!!

This is my one of journal as I didn't have time in ChiangRai to meditate on it more and write it in my diary book. I would like to shout 'God is great', 'he is so cool all the time'.. =)

Hope all of you have been good and get a good day to walk with Jesus Christ. God bless all of you!!

Kate

No school in Montana

2005-05-19T02:57:00.000-07:00

Sa Wad D kha,

Just a short note for all of you who have been getting my update through this blog. I won't go to Montana for sure, cuz the SODS won't be taking place next year. The another way which I shared last time that God lights it for me is on the praying time right now. I'm pretty sure what God calls me to serve him right after ChiangRai, but I have to wait for the answer from Directors of that ministry. Please keep praying that I will be the right place for God, and my life will be a blessings to Thais.

God is so faithful by showing me how he wants me to walk in humility as I don't know what I'm going to do. There is a song talking about there is always the way out for everyone, I just listened it last night. So I got the encouraging through the song.

May you have a good time with your own family and Christ family.

Blessings & love,
Kate

2 ways for choosing.

2005-04-29T04:55:00.000-07:00

Hello.....

Greetings from very hot season in ChiangRai... Wooo... so hot here, and I know I shouldn't grumbling....

Well, I would like to give some updates of what going on with me right now. The dancing class is going pretty well. We are working on cherography both Ballet and Jazz dance right now. I really enjoy with it. Lots of thing I have learned from Jackie both of dancing and spiritual life.Bob and Jackie are a big blessing to me as I'm here in ChiangRai..

I taught some dances to Eden House girls so that they will perform in America while they are travelling to visit the churches who support the Eden House ministry. It was good to use my ability, and I had much fun to be with teenagers. Really impress the friendship we have for only 4 days... So next week I'm in the same schedule before.

My devotional in this week are on 1 Samuel, so I have been meditating on David's life. I feel like God is speaking to me about leadership and the unity in the team. David was the man of God, and his life effected lots of youth at that time while he was hinding from Saul. Lots of thoughts and his maners are tracking my heart,I can't stop on reading the bible. There are lots of reason that God lead me to meditate on this book, and I'm praying to find the final answer in the end... Anyway, I really love the word of God right now.

@ 2 ways for choosing like the subject of this week.. That I meaned, I got 2 ways to choose right now. Once is about going to Montana, but there nothing clear to me. It's blinded to me, and I'm pretty sure that God shuts it down from me right now. I got another way which is so clear to me, but I'll share until I get all of thing to the final decision. Please keep praying for me as I really wanna know which way please God the most. Both way make me to be sacrifice, and I'm willing to it if God confirm me so clear... God is so good to me, and he is wonderful to my life at this time. His words encourage me so much, and his people always encourage me many time. I love to be in the team and family like this. Praise God for calling me to be in his family.

I have to go.... Pray all of you are doing good, have a healthy both spiritual and physical life. More wisdom from God everyday to pursue his purpose... May God bless you.

Love,
Kate

Life of Faith

2005-04-15T07:20:00.000-07:00

Hello!!!!!

Hey, I'm still have much fun in ChiangRai, with painting the house in yellow color... we have no choice,so the Robison's house is turn to yellow color by everyone who lives in the house... ha ha ha ha... Can't imagine to wake up among the yellow color every morning.... I will used to with it, hope so!!!

Last couple weeks was a challenging in faith to me. I felt bad for being frustated like crazy person who doesn't believe God at all. Yeah it was about my dream, I set much a high hope on going to do School Of Dance Studies in Montana, but it's not a time of God to let me in, so the school may not runing on in January 2006. I was frustated to tell myself that God has other plan for me. 2 weeks I thought lots of way I can go,but it wasn't a time for myself anymore. God wants totally of me to fullfill his dream.

At Naan camp this week, I shared with one girl, when she asked "Do you think God will allow our dream become true?". Y'know! I thought I couldn't encourage her anything because I'm struggling with it right now... I have no place to go or any thing to do. What I have to do or I can do it's hard for me to enjoy to do that. I didn't have peace inside. Anyway, 3 days in Naan, God gave me many encouragements and peaces to live my life with him. Then I told all of my stories to that girl. 2 dreams we can choose to make it real, one is our dream and an another is God's dream. Let's get back to a couple month ago, I prayed many time that I wanna be a person who fullfills God's dream for my life more than anything else. I wanna make his dream comes true, and I have been waiting to hear from him what his dream is...... Then this news came to me as a nightmare, but God's dream is starting to be involved in my life in the way I didn't espect to. I just relized it through my devotional time when I got 1 Samuel 9:24. I felt God was speaking to me directly "there is something he seperated for me in the right hour and now it's up fornt of me, I need to take it." God answered me and that girl at the same time... Praise God.... He is so wonderful to my life.

I'm in wickness right now. Lots of struggling in the battle of enemy. The Scriptures of God for me today is that Jesus overcome the world among our trails and sorrows.

He spoke to me to keep praying on this. At the right time I will find out what God wants me to do. Yes,,,, this story may not new to someone, but it teaches us everytimes to trust in this truth of God.....

Thank you so much for all of you who has been praying, supporting, encouraging and doing everything for me..... Life is not easy, and learn to respond to everything in our life that kinda scaring thing, sometimes though. May God bless you thousand time on what you've done for other... Happy Thai New Year as well.... =)

Blessings & Love
Kate

Greetings from ChiangRai

2005-03-28T21:40:00.000-08:00

Hey,

I'm doing pretty good in ChiangRai. Spending lots of time with God helps me to adjust and be myself as much as I can. Praise God for who he is.....

I felt better with the dance right now, cuz I'm keep praying that God will poure more love of dancing in my heart, and I did the bible study with Jackie for the book "The Heart of Artist". This book helps me a lot to be honest with God with all of my attitudes and to the people in the team. I know now how I deal with people in my team as I have to desciple them and build the better relationship with people. This couple weeks I still impressing how the relationship is beautiful.... When I honest with people and my friends and show my love to them, there are lots of blessings come from God's hands. I'm looking forward that God can change me to be more a kind of loving people, not like the past who I used to be. So I would like to thankx all of my friends in BAngkok, ChiangMai,ChiangRAi and Phangnga that all of you still calling me, smsing me and encouraging me.... Thankx God that I never lack any of friend wherever I am.... God is good and his people are good, too....

I have to go for my dancing class... Hope to get on update next week. May God bless all of you richly!! I love all of you, and I have no idea how to repay all of your blessings. Just keep praying for all of you, girls and guys!!! Bye

Blessings,
Kate

living in ChiangRai

2005-03-18T15:17:00.000-08:00

Hey!!!

Can't believe I have been in ChiangRai for 6 days already. I didn't count the dates for any reason..... I like ChiangRai, and I got 6 days to relax, be by myself, process all of my emotional and spend time with a couple who I stay with. So everything is going so well. God is so faithful,eh?

I'm glad to be here and making a new fellowship with people,but there is a little bit sad to leave my friends in Bangkok. I heard many thing happened in Bangkok, so I'm worry about it, but God is there in Bangkok to solve all problem and bring people together in his body. Sometimes I told myself I wish I was there to help out each problem or even my words will be an encouragement to people, but I'm not of that obligation.So I need to look forward what I'm doing here.

Last couple days I got a chance to talk with my mum. She's doing good and everything is going good in my hometown. She also said the same sentence which I heard from my dad that she released me to do whatever I want to do. I felt "wow... God is so big". Y'know how comes both of them allowed me to do what I have dreamed for .... I'm glad that my prayers and all of your prayers for me are answered!!!! I didn't stop right here, I'm praying for them to get saved through Jesus' life. Praise God!!!

I have much joy to study dance right now. There are Ballet class and Jazz class. Once time I felt like Ballet is so difficult for me cuz God didn't create my body for ballet dance, but I need to learn this as a basic to go to other kind of dances. Please pray for me that I won't give up and keep practicing it as well as I would like to perform it to unreach people. I got email from Dance Department in YWAM Montana, America that they asking to pray about joining summer outreach for 2 months after the School of Dance is over on June. So the length should be in June 12 to Augut 8, 2006. I would like to join in cuz I need some experience of evangelical dancing,but I would rather wait until God tells me to do. So... keep praying for me that I will have enough money to do or get a scholarship to join in summer outreach if this is come from God. I don't plan to anything right now, cuz I need to wait and depend on God more.

Hope that your days are going good, too. Hope that you enjoy with your days. May God bless you.

Love & Blessings,
Kate

Word of God speaks

2005-03-10T16:04:00.000-08:00

"Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10

This word came to me this morning while I was listening to God's voice. This is the promise of God to his nation, and now it applys to me as I have much fear. Last night I had a nightmare, and I couldn't sleep, so I kept asking for God's protection. I have been dreamed like this more than 2 times, and I have no idea what's going with me. This Scripture stopped all of my worry and made me peaceful.

2 days left for being in Bangkok I'm ready to go to ChiangRai. Well, I've done my working on both translation, but the National office's hosting the YWAM Thailand Leader meeting, so I have to be around to help with translation some documents and in the meeting. So I'm leaving to ChiangRai on Saturday at night.

This moment I found out that God wants me to pray for other people a lot. I love to do that so, cuz while I have strength I want to give out as much as I can. I'm learning about the power of prayer, and how to pray for others. Thanks to the Lord because he allowed me to know this mystery while I was translating for Sam and Amy in the first week of the School Of Worship. Through all of my translation works, I have learned lots of thing which is becoming a big blessing to my life. Then I enjoy with the working on translation a lot.

All I've done for good I would like to give it back to God for his glory..... I'm going to start to do a new thing which I've dreamed so long.... I'm excited because God is with me....

Taking a good care .... I will keep update on me when I'm in ChiangRai.

Kate

Hey

2005-03-03T20:39:00.000-08:00

Just a short message that I'm here in Bangkok, Thailand. I didn't go back home to visiy my parents, but when I talked to my dad the miracle come to me because he allowed me to work as what I'm interested in. Cool, God is so faithful cuz I'm praying and I believe that you are praying for me, too. Thank you so much for keep praying for me.

I will leave for ChiangRai for sure on March 12, at night. I hope to finish my traslation works about the Globla Perspectives #4th and 50 days prayer of YWAM before I leave. There is many problem with the computer that I have to travel a lot, and I would like to finish this as soon as I can. So ... keep praying for me.

Next time of posting may be I'm in ChiangRai already. I will staying with Bob & Jackie Robinson for sure... My hope is that God will use me to be a blessing to people up there. I need to focus on the dancing, and I would like to be wise in living with those people.Anyway, my highest goal is I will be closer to God and have a deep relationship with him.

May God bless you all, I will miss people in Bangkok and other area a lot.

Love in Christ,
Kate

6 days left

2005-02-22T02:41:00.000-08:00

hey,

Would like to share:

I have only 6 days left to be around in the office. Praise God for he helps me on training Radt to take my place, and it goes pretty well. My job is almost done, and I feel release from that, too. I see that Tim and Radt can work together easily.

I will leave Bangkok for sure on the 28th of February to be with my family, resting and working on the translation project which is about 50 days of prayer and fasting, and the GP of YWAM international. I hope to get a chance to visit the Tsunami camp before I come back to Bangkok on March 9. Anyway, I'm praying these 9 days with family will be a blessing time to me because I told them already what I'm planing to do in the future, and I told them I don't want to earn lot of money in normal job, for I love to help people more than anything. They didn't express any feeling to me yet, but we may talk in detail while I'm at home.

I got ticket to go to ChiangRai this afternoon-- Yes, it's sad to me because I didn't have enough time to spend with my friends and everyone in House of One Heart. It's sad that I have to leave from the comfort zone and step out in the water... But it will change my life that I will have deeper relationship with him through my staying in ChiangRai. Here is a big home for me to learn and grow in God's love, and it will be nothing the same when I get back here. However, I'm ready now to go wherever God wants me to go. Anyway, I would like to say "thanks to God" for everything ...

Hi

2005-02-15T10:41:00.000-08:00

hey,

greetings from Bangkok, Thailand. I'm here in Bangkok for 2 weeks.

"Love never gives up, never losses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance" 1 Corinthians 13:7, NLT

Due to my plans have been changing many time, so I just lay it down before God and wait to see what God wants to me to do. It sounds like he needs me to rest more than working after February. Well, I hope to be in ChiangRai on 15th of March.

For P'Jeong Ah .... I miss you so much, my dearest sister. I don't know where you are and what you are doing right now, but please take my words.. Happy Birthday to you. You had been a big challenge to my life. I pray that you are a big blessing to everyone in this world. I love you and can't wait to meet with you again. I'm no longer with House Of One Heart, and I will serve God with all my strength and mind for God's Kingdom will be established in Thailand and other countries around us.

Thanks Sara for all of your encouragements. I love you girl. All of my friends are here, and I'm glad to see that they are growing up in godly way. Tae is going to apply for doing DTS next school. Praise God... Thankx for bass guitar, I like its colour and I didn't play yet, but hope this Sunday we will enjoy with it.

Miss all of you. Taking a good care.

Blessings,
Kate

Testing of faith

2005-02-09T20:27:00.000-08:00

" When your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow." Jame 1:3
" We know that [Trails] are good for us -- They help us learn to endure." Romans 5:3

Right now I'm very busy!! Working and preparing myself to leave Bangkok. My plan is changing, and I have to wait what I'm going to do. Well, I felt this way -- My faith is tested, and many time I go back to God and say "I'm endureless". I can't wait to meet with his plan of my life, then these powerful words spoke to me in this morning...
Again, I forgot how to trust in the Name of the Lord while I'm moving to other step. We interviewed a new receptionist yesterday, and I felt like how can I find a right person to fit in the empty place. God is so wonderful, for he's leading me to his truth that no matter what's going to happen, God is always in control. He taught me with my failure of choosing a wrong person, and I had to process this with myself. Yeah, I felt guilty to say everything or make any decision. Then when I met with a new receptionist whom we accepted to work with us, I felt peace and more trusting in God. Praise God .... my serving is going to be ended with peace and trustful.

Tim Golin is a new YWAM Thailand administrator of National Office. YWAM Thailand can be change to the better way, for we're getting more quality people. Thanks to God for this... May His kingdom comes to Thailand ....

Praise God

2005-02-01T19:45:00.000-08:00

Hey,

Three things which happened within one day that I would like to shout for his faithfulness...

Firstly, the DTS team in the South got all money which they need to spend for flying back to ChiangMai on the 4th of February. It was a great miracle to everyone in the team, and it encouraged me that God's great all the time.

Secondly, I'm praying to get a laptop, for I really want to use it in my daily life. I'm plaing to do animation,so I'm asking God to provide the money for me, and I feel like God will give it to me. Then I got 20,000 baht yesterday as my support money from Fiona, so I'm thinking to save it for buying a laptop. I need more about 28,000 baht for this. Just keep praying about it...

Finally, God answered my prayer one thing. I won't give the detail, but I felt this is a wonderful answer that God gave to me. Praise God..

I don't know yet if I should go up to ChiangRai in the mid of March or not. God's only one who knows. My plan after I leave National Office is going back home first to help in the Tsunami relief Efforts which I have been praying and waiting to go since December 28, 2004. Then coming back to Bangkok to help in the National Office for 3 days. If it's God's time to let me go to ChiangRai, then I will go after the 13th of March. Please pray for Jackie's mom, for she is very sick.

Ram II base is very growing up. The SOW is going to start the second class on February 21. The newest ministry which is called "Performing Arts/Worship ministry" is going to announce who we are on the Feb 3. Danny Brown is the director for this ministry, for he is no longer director of House of One Heart and he has a heart to all kinds of art. We began the ministry with 5 of us - Danny, Tan Srisombat, Nok Ngeonsombat, Pan Piawong and I, Kate Rammasoon. -- Praise God ---

May you have a good time.
Kate

God is so faithful

2005-01-30T17:29:00.000-08:00

Hey,

I'm doing good at this week. Just sometimes I felt very tired and so discourage while I was sitting in the storm. But when I brought it up to talk with my leaders, it became more clear. Thanks God for putting me among with wise leaders, for they have been my wonderful councilors. And thanks to Sara who's always stand beside me when I don't know whom I should talk to. Although you are in America, you never let me feel lonely.. you go girl ....

God's plan is so perfect I have to remember this all the time cuz I kept setting my own plan and being worry too much with the future. Yes, there is fear, and I allow it to take place in my hand. So sorry with that, but God is really faithful to draw me back to his love again. Right now I can't tell where I should be in March, but I do trust God that his plan on the right time is so perfect."Just letting God do his work" touched my heart so much, for this moment I'm looking for someone who can take place of mine in the National Office before I leave and someone who can be receptionist for the National Office. God knows my needed, he sees it, and he won't forsake it... Right now I feel realease from my burden..God will put the right person in these position.Praise God ....

I mailed letter to my parents and shared about my plan in the future. I bet they won't totally agree with me as I want to be volunteer and missionary, but I would like you to pray that they won't seriously ask me to go back home again. They have asking me hunred times to go back home and get a serious job which I could earn lots of money. Moreover, I would like to follow my dream and I know this is a time that God set for me. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. Thank you so much.... Have a good week.

No TB virus in my lung

2005-01-20T22:29:00.000-08:00

hey,

Just a short note to let you know that I got the result today. The skin test of mine is positive, but the x-ray test is normal. The doctor said there is no TB virus like someone said before. It's God's grace, for I didn't do anything besides praying.God is so faithful to provide all money that I need to spend in this case, and he also comfort my heart with his peace in the way that I can't understand at all.Praise God for who he is.

I miss my friends and everyone who is far away from me. My future is changing now to the another way, and I trust that God is with me I can go everywhere or do everything by his strengthened. Blessed his name. May all of you have a wonderful time in this weekend. Be peacful with our mighty God...

Love & Blessings,
Kate

Update on me...

2005-01-18T20:04:00.000-08:00

Hey,

I'm here in Bangkok, Thailand. Only 1 & 1/2 month left to be in Bangkok, then I will be appear in ChiangRai as a student of dance. Well, this week I have learned how to make my heart right before God as I'm in a storming situation. I was tired when I heard many story of other people, and I felt like I couldn't walk with them any more. But God never let us to give up in fellowship with other. God taught me to change my attitude and learn from his heart in loving way. Then once again, I got up and took my cross to follow Jesus.

I found out yesterday that I got TB virus in my lung while I was checking my health test in the hospital. Then I couldn't get my childhood record of Immunization for it was lost. My mum checked out the place which should save my recorded, but they told her it was destroyed long time ago. I didn't worry about it a lot, but I need to use it for my applying to School Of Dance in Montana. So God made me humble and let him work through this again. I can't do anything with my strength. .... ... ... ... ... ... Anyway, I will get the result of my health test on Friday, and I pray there no thing to be frustated with beside TB virus. Just keep praying for me.

2005-01-06T23:43:00.000-08:00

Tsunami PhuKet Thailand on Dec 26, 2004.

//~.~\\

2005-01-06T02:12:00.000-08:00

Hey,

Just a short message that I'm doing good right now. Busy with some works in the office and my graduation in the University.

God is so good to me in every ways. I found I'm resting my soul in his presence cuz when trouble comes, we always see it bigger than God. But the Lord told me to trus in who He is. That's true!!! It's all about him, not about us.

Praise God for everything. He is so good, and his love endures forever.

Wave killers disaster in the South of Thailand.

2004-12-27T18:06:00.000-08:00

Dear all,

I still staying at Sam's house, and praying what I should do for this matter.This morning my beloved friend's feneral is held, and it shouldn't be longer than 3 days because she had died one day and half already before anyone found her body. Her name was "June" she was my very close friend when I was 12 yrs old until 18 yrs old, so we knew each other deeply 6 yrs. When I moved to Bangkok, she studied in Songkla. She was a good girl and good friend, so all of my closes friends in high school and I love her so much. It's sad to me because after we say good-bye on the phone before I came to Bangkok, I didn't get any chance to meet her yet. I wrote and called her sometimes, but I have no chance to know I won't meet her anymore. She wasn't Christian yet, so it bring me to think how she will be suffering of her spirit in the eternal life.

My other friends are still in a great grief, and I know how hard for her parents. I can't go from here to Phangnga for her feneral, but I'm flexible for anyone from there call me, and I give them encouargement. I'm praying from them, and hope to see God move in Phangnga with his mighty power. I'm so sad,too. Before I heard this news, I got Scriptures in Ecclesiastes 3 which said there is a time for everything. It encouraged me to keep seeking God no matter what's happening. God is so faithful, and I trust in him.

Thank you so much for every prayers for us. May God bless you.

Love & Blessings,
Kate

Merry Christmas!!

2004-12-26T01:17:00.000-08:00

Hey,

I just want to say "Merry Christmas to everyone here!". I'm doing good, and I had a so wonderful time to celebrate my lovest Jesus Christ last night with BJD. I woke up this morning with flog behind my building. I love to see that, it's so beautiful. It's not cold at all in Bangkok.

I'm in Sam Sarvis' house today until the 29th of December to be with myself and rest while Sam with his family are taking vocation in Koa Chang. This isn't a complain, I just feel I met with too much people, and I'm so tired. I need sometimes to be with myself to think and be with God. Then I will update on me later!!!

May you have a good year to start, and may God is always with you....

Love and Blessings,
Kate

To be humble

2004-12-21T01:23:00.000-08:00

Christmas greetings from Bangkok.......

It's a little bit cool down here, but I really like it. What am I doing at this moment? I'm working in the YWAM Thailand, National Office and preparing myself to be ready for my graduation next month.

It's close to the Christmas day. I love Christmas, for it's all about Jesus!!! So I spend my time praying and worshiping our Lord, Jesus Christ more than in the past.

Last weekend I commited to a sin which I dealt with it many time. I won't explain in deep detail, but only one thing I want to share I found how can I meet with God. When I woke up on Monday evening with some headache, I started to worship God with playing guitar and singing. I cried not only I felt sorry for what I had done, but I was touched by humble King. I strongly felt I should be humble before my King, and Jesus forgave me for that sin. Moreover, I spoke in Toungue, and I felt God led me to ask for forgiveness to others.

Myself found out the way to meet God with a humble heart. Yes, a humble heart before him and others. If we are in the same body of Christ, would you pray for me to be healing and to be set free from what I'm dealing with? I also pray for you....

My event

2004-12-15T23:13:00.000-08:00

Well, Hi ..... to all visitors.

I'm here in Bangkok, and I had a good time to talk with Phil Porter, my boss No 2. He got back from U.S.A on Nancy events. We talked about my plans and stuff such as my family, my support money, and it seems like God made it so clear to me now. I love the office, I love my job now, but I have to move on my vision and make it to become real. And I love to learn from different places and experiences.

Well, I don't want to give much detail of that until it's going to happen..... My graduation day will be on Jan 12, at noon in my University. My family inculding some of my dad relatives will come for it. I don't know what's going to happen when they are there, but I do trust in the Lord that he will show me how to speak on the right time with a right word. No more fear for the future, and no more fear for human because God is always with me and besides me to help me go through each situation. I put my heart to be joyful of learning..... Then I will overcome my fear with love and trust.

Pai was very upset with me on Tuesday night. She didn't talk to me at all, nor did she came worship with us at all. I said very strong word to her and tried to make her obedience what I tell her many times. I hope that she didn't feel rejected by me!!! ... Well, I need wisdom to take care God's sheep. I'm waiting for her to come back, and I still keep praying for her. I don't want to make her feel like I'm the person who care for her more than God. I want her to relize God is only one to be with her all the time... Please keep praying for me. Thank you so much. God is so faithful to me... I still keep saying this to everybody.

Have a good time for this weekend!! .....

Prayer Request!!

2004-12-08T01:42:00.000-08:00

Hey .......

I'm really busy at this moment, and tomorrow we're going to have a memorial of Nancy Ross at the Avana Hotel. . . . . . .I'm glad to be there soon.

One girl whom I try to principle with God's love names "Pai". She always acts like tom-boy girl, and she accepted Jesus Christ to be in her life while I was teaching dances in ChiangMai. ... Please pray for my strength and wisdom, for I have no idea to take care this girl any more, and I really upset with myself. Moreover, I used to tell everyone that we shouldn't give up because one day she will change to a better way.In God everything can be possible, I really want to feel and see in the same way with God, to be like Jesus when he was with his desciples. . . .. . . I'm longing to see a changing in her life. Although she wants someone who loves her for real and she wants everyone to accept who she is, she still act out in a wrong way. . . . It's sound like who I used to be when I first came to Bangkok in 4 yrs ago, right? That's a big reason why I want to help her to know God and walk in godly way. Something she does has reflected to me as I did it before, and I understand her very well.. . .. .Please pray for me at this point for now.

For His glory!!!!

Kate

The begining of my new year!!

2004-12-04T20:42:00.000-08:00

Greetings!!!!

How are you all doing? Although I had lots of thing to do in last week til on Saturday, I was doing very good and not really tired. God revealed himself through the Strategic Planing workshop with Chip and Sandy last week that he will change our base to glorify his name. And he brought each one of us to be more intermate in this family. It was a good time for me, but I won't be here longer, so it was sad a little bit. . . . . . . . . Anyway, I wish to see our team in Bangkok being one body for Christ.

One thing I would like to share is what I told you last time. My birthday gift which I asked from God. I told him that I would like to share my life with 2 people, and I set a goal to make them become Christian. ... But ... I was in the office for many hours to be in workshop, and I don't know how can I shared my life with those people that I have asked for. What is impossible for us will be possible in God's sight, right? My closes friend from my high school called me on that day, and she didn't have my phone number, but she really wanted to talk to me and she got my number from my another friend. Then we talked a lot about my life and what I want to do in the near future. She got a job, but she doesn't like her job. She wants me to move down and stay with her so that she has one person to talk with. I feel like it's not God's will, but I would like to talk to her sometimes, so I told her all of my feeling to be Christian, my plans and how God is so wonderful in my life. Although she doesn't become Christian, I felt God gives me a hope to keep praying for her and share my life with her more. It was a very wonderful gift to me that I can get in touch with her, and she always trust me to share her life with me. I love her so much!! Now I love her more because God loves her. And God gave me one person to disciple her, so I got what I have asked for. Thank you Jesus.

I will update more cuz I will be in the office the whole week. May you have a good time with God.

Love,
Kate

//-_-\\

2004-11-29T02:54:00.000-08:00

Hey .....

Just want to let you know where I am!! I'm in Bangkok for now. Last week I was in Pattaya to join in Tamar Praise. .... Pretty tired with many thing.

Wooooooo .... I would say thankx to the Lord cuz I'm getting a guitar on my Birthday, and it come from my dearest friend -- Sara!! I should keep it very nicely right???? ........ I think so...And fews more day in this week I will be 23 yrs old ... Ha - it was what I have been waiting for, since all of my friends already turned to 23rd. Well, I have another special prayer request for my dearest Heavenly Father, but I can't tell you now. When it heppens, I will share to all of you. Just keep praying for me and I'm so excited to see how it gonna happen. I do believe and have faith that God is so faithful, and what I wish it will be heppen for sure ........

I'm not feeling well for some reason, and I'm dealing with it. I don't know yet how it works, but God told me today to wait on him patiently. I believe in his words, so I try to wait on him patiently. Tuesday through Saturday of this week I will be in a seminar. I really need more wisdom and prayerful cuz I don't know what should I keep doing. I really want to know what God's desire for my life in next 4-5 yrs. Dealing with other people is such a big job to do, but I do learned a lot from it. But now ??? --- I'm so discourage with it. It takes time for me!!!!!!!

Coming back to Bangkok

2004-11-21T02:18:00.000-08:00

... I can't put my feeling into words... It's hard.

When I was in ChiangRai, I felt yeah!! Lord this is what I want to do. I met with The Robinson, and I didn't relize that they were in English camp at my school when I was 13 yrs old. I knew them before, but I couldn't recognize them til I saw myself in their video of outreaching in Thailand. It was 10 yrs ago, and I'm one fruit that many people keep praying for me, and God chose me to be his daughter. Anyway, I'm ready to move on next step which means I will be in ChiangRai on March til August of 2005. And God will provide a place to stay, and where I shall serve him there during my study.

On Saturday morning, I got a call from Sam Sarvis. He told me about the leaving time to be with Jesus of Nancy Ross!!

Yes, who knows? I was praying in my heart that God won't let her go until I go back to the office(Bangkok). But Saturday was my last day in ChiangRai. I cried!!! I cried!!! Without any question, without any sad feeling, only one sentense kept saying in my heart was "Thank you God, Thank you Jesus". It was her time, and she had much peace in the end of her earth life. I agreed with God to let her be with him, although it was sad among us. I sang praise to God with all my heart. Now on I believe every time when I worship God, I will sense Nancy's vioce close to my ears... I have been earing like that many time. Moreover, I saw how beauty of God is through her life, her endurances, her love with God and all testimonies of her life in this world. Thanks to God for giving her to us when she was serving him in Thailand. I'm glad that I had her to be my supporter with everything that I wanted. Praise God for her life, praise God for his glory .... Forever Amen!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Flying Time...

2004-11-15T18:45:00.000-08:00

Hey,,,,

Only fews hour I'm in the office then I will catch a bus to ChiangRai. I bet I may lose of contact at this time, but it might be a good time for me to rest and pray for the vision. .... ... ... ... My weekend was good, I spent lots of time practicing some dances and preparing for the Tamar Praise, which will be held in Pattaya on 25th - 27 th of November. ... I studied guitar bass with Shine, too.

I don't know what God is going to show me in a next couple day, but I feel like I should be close to him, and be ready to give up my right and sacrifice my dearest thing to him. ..... It gonna be hard for me if I'm not ready for anything that he wants to move on in my life. ... The weak point of mine is I'm a worry person. I can't leave it to God and let him show me each step to deal with it...
:-( So I'm starting to learn and produce it as a good fruit in my life.

I strengthly feel God wants me to ask more of him, seek his will in all I do so that he will direct my path.. That what I feel in the begining of this week!! Anyway, I'm so sad that I won't be in the worship night with all students and staffs of House of One Heart, but I pray that all of them will have a good time and sense God's love through the Holy spirit for tonight. .... And I myself believe that I will have a good time in ChiangRai .....

whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything. If you need wisdom--if you want to know what God wants you to do--ask him, and he will gladly tell you. He will not resent your asking. Jame 1:2-5

Owww .... My weekend!! //^-^\\

2004-11-11T23:47:00.000-08:00

Hey ...... How are all of you doing? .... May God be with you and bless you richly ...

I'm on the very busy schedule in the next couple weeks, and I'm glad to have something to do and travel to somewhere cuz I love to travel, but now it's not the right time yet to take lots of journey -I'm still working in the office!!!

Today I just wondered why God spoke to me two time ~.~? By my bible study class and daily word in my email receiving, he said ::We know that [trials] are good for us--they help us learn to endure. Romans 5:3, NLT :: so??? I knew myself is dealing with how much I'm worry with everything, and I should say "trails" are good for me in order to make me endure and get a good fruit in my life, right? Last night I chatted with God many thing and I felt like nothing I can do and bear more except I must leave it at his feet. Even though myself wants to figure out the way to win, God is only person who can change me from the inside to outside. Well, I love this week so much.

I was touched by Jesus' charecter that he gives us more as much as he can. Usually, I give and I will say it's enough, but when I look through Jesus' story in the scriptures, it's so different. He gave us more without saying I give it enough I should have some of mine. Can you remember scriptures when people came to Jesus in the evening, and Jesus asked God to bless his food so that he can feed these people? Why don't Jesus let them go like his disciple said? I don't think Jesus only wanted to do miracle so that those people will believe where he came from, but he set a good example to us that needed people come to us we shouldn't say go and be blessed. And his charecter is never forsake us. Sometime when I didn't much conferdent how I can trust him, I will come back to think about this scripture. It's true and so true to our life. I have seen a lot in my leaders and other people around me that they are following this charecter of Jesus. Thanks to Jesus..

Well, have a good weekend to everyone. I have much of thing to do on weekend, but I guess I have enough time to rest.......... Taking a good care, God bless
//*-*\\

It's clear //-\\

2004-11-10T23:27:00.000-08:00

Great day!!!!

Well..... I'm doing so good today, after took a nap =) ..Requiring for graduation is going on very well,and I almost done with process, now I have to wait to get my important education paper that I will use on my gradutaion day....Last night I called my parents, and their mind haven't yet change. God spoke through Sam that I should be available for God when he calls to me to somewher else to serve him, in the same way, God will take care of my family... One thing what I only can do is focusing on him.......Anyway, I would like to thanks God for letting me learn from this situation so that I can bear his goodness to other.

I dicide to go to ChiangRai on Wednesday next to visit Bob and Jackie Robinson. I'm so excited!! ...Although I have to travel alone, again=( , I trust that God's peaces will be with me all the way to Chiang or back to Bangkok...

And now, may the God of peace, who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, all that is pleasing to him. Jesus is the great Shepherd of the sheep by an everlasting covenant, signed with his blood. To him be glory forever and ever. Amen. Hebrews 13

@---- Candy day ^.^

2004-11-09T01:04:00.000-08:00

Today????
I'm doing very good!!!! Cuz I spend most of my time whorshiping & praying. Sam, my boss or Director of YWAM Thailand, Tae, my close Thai friend who lives in the same house with me, and I just prayed for Thailand. God revealed us how much he cares for poor people, and we started our prayer with asking the Holy spirit to be with us and lead us to pray for Thailand. Then myself just relized how much poor people have to bear unjustice. I'm glad to be apart of asking for my nation in this time.... Today is the 9th day of praying we have more 31 days, please pray for all of us here in Thailand.

My journey to ChiangRai next week will happen or not it's up to God. I'm fine now, and I'm looking forward to meet with a wonderful couple whom I'm going to spend time with next year. Anyway, I will keep smilling and walking through all of my emotion with God. It should be fine.. I believe (^o-)

Little bit of my feeling.

2004-11-07T19:47:00.000-08:00

Today I should post something that I really need someone to pray for me, but I don't know how to describe it.

I have planed to go to ChiangRai in the end of this year to visit Jackie, who is going to be my teacher of Jazz and Ballet dances, but it seems like my plan will change. May be I have to go next week ( Nov 17), and it goes so fast than I thought I will be ready for it. Last night when I spent time to share my feeling with God, I found out how much I fear for my loneliness and to see my future comes. I haven't share with my parents yet, for they won't accept my thinking they want me to get a job instead of serving God in YWAM Thailand. My emotional feeling is I really need my family support me by allowing me to do what God has planed for me.

Sara has encouraged me so much through her words to sense it's my vision, I should move on without fear. God also spoke to me last couple week while I was teaching dances in DTS ChiangMai to move forward with Christ passion. So pray for me to be ready and move forward to God' s purpose. I know "fear" doesn't come from God, and I got a song in my mind that I need to know that God loves me more and he will take my fear away with his love.

The good news is I can graduate in January for sure, and now it's going be last process to work through requiring diploma on this Thursday. My family will come up here on January 10-14, 2005 to congratulations with me, and it will be my time to share what I'm going to do in the future. I always tell God to help me speak the right word on the right time. Keep praying for me na kha. Anyway, I will have my family picture then, for I didn't have it until now. Praise the Lord!!

My crazy foreigner closes friend! ( She should be called Thai girl.)

2004-11-06T19:58:00.000-08:00

She is my closes friend, the middle one. She left me in Thailand, and herself is now in Boston, U.S.A. I miss her so much, so I should have her pics on my blog... ( I miss you so muchieee Sara!!)

2004-11-06T01:45:00.000-08:00

Here is our recent picture, we were in Pan & Gan wedding in October 30, 2004. All girls dressed up so nicely, and we had much fun in the wedding. =)

2004-11-06T01:37:00.000-08:00

I love this picture so much cuz Dow and I had much fun to perform as worshiper in Asia Pecific Conference of June 2004 in Pattaya.

2004-11-06T01:26:00.000-08:00

My picture in last Christmas (2003)

Christian Life

2004-11-05T20:35:00.000-08:00

God is so faithful.

With begining of sharing myself, I would like to present my God that he is so faithful. I'm here to be with him and leran more about Christainiality which is very different from Buddism. Walk with faith without seeing anything can be possible, and I have been learning 4 yrs with his faithful. I love him so much.